I live a project-based existence.

I’ve been aware for a long time that I live my life from one project to the next. I find something to do and then focus all my attention and effort towards that one thing. What that thing is ranges from professional to personal and everything in between. And every time I ‘finish’ one of these projects I have a period of disorientation due to the sudden lack of that thing that focuses me. Until the next one comes along.

Recently I was forced to find a new project. This time the subject is myself. My way of thinking, looking at things, personal discipline. The way I live my life.

This time achieving goals and seeing improvements is all the more rewarding because I reap the benefits both ways.

And the good thing about this project is that it will never end.

The most mundane situations may turn out to be some of the most memorable of our lives:

For the next two hours, we drove through the city. She showed me the building where she had once worked as an elevator operator. We drove through the neighborhood where she and her husband had lived when they were newlyweds. She had me pull up in front of a furniture warehouse that had once been a ballroom where she had gone dancing as a girl. Sometimes she’d ask me to slow in front of a particular building or corner and would sit staring into the darkness, saying nothing. 

When I hear a good song,
When I see a bright red sunset,
When Steve does something cute
I want to share it.

When I have a good cup of coffee,
When I watch a funny movie,
When I think of something silly
I want to share it. 

When I feel happy,
When I feel sad
I want to share it. 

I’m not sure I want that to go away.

Sometimes the shit just keeps piling on. During the last month two friends have been in serious motor accidents and two friends have had serious health issues.

Not to sound like a cliché, but some things have been put into perspective.

It’s enough to make my atheistic ass say that you guys are in my prayers.

According to this test, my brain is exactly half male and half female. Which would explain a lot.

 me

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